"the catholic church elects a new pope whenever the old one dies or folds completely in half."

Right now I am passive-aggressively taking my sweet time drinking a caramel mocha. But, quite honestly, I don't understand why poor communication should impede my ability to indulge in caffeine. Particularly when it is really tasty and includes wireless access.

I have been devoured by mosquitos to a phenomenal degree after last night's fire shindig at Alex's house in the boondocks of Angelica. Do you want an accurate depiction of how far into the middle of nowhere Alex lives? We drove to the Kwik Trip in Bonduel to buy supplies for Smores. And even after we were satiated and had our Little Buddies in our hands, Diana and I couldn't help being snobby "city" girls and saying, "I cannot believe we are in Bonduel."

Speaking of the city, Diana is in New York for the weekend. I am really jealous because I was invited along but airfare was obscenely expensive. Actually, no, I am jealous because Diana is seeing Cirque de Soleil. She and I saw it together in Madison last fall and we have a pretty deep obsession with it, so I'm maybe even more jealous of that than I am of all the shopping she will get to do. And I really like shopping.

Anyway, back to last night, which was much fun: Anna was a. not working at Titletown and b. present, and in rare form. She melted torn-up cheese curds on her mini pretzels in the microwave and described some new MTV show as "the one where they turn ghetto men into gentlemen." Which caused me to spit my Diet Pepsi back into the ginormous Badgers stein out of which I was drinking it.

The most classic moment, however, was that Tim, Alex's dad, was trapped alone with us. Tim thinks (knows) we are noisy lunatics. Normally this is fine because Alex's mom, Laurie, is present and loves us and can deal with us quite well. (This feeling is mutual. Diana and I especially adore Laurie. Everything she does is hilarious.) She was in Buffalo for work, but we got to talk to her on the phone! Kind of. We could really only hear Tim's half of the conversation, and then we yelled loudly enough that he just gave me the phone.

Tim: I was wondering when you would call. [Pause.] Oh, you're at grown-up Chuck E Cheese right now?
Diana and I: SHE'S AT DAVE AND BUSTER'S?!?! (Another thing Diana and I love: Jillian's, the coolest restaurant to ever be in Green Bay, Wisconsin, which unfortunately has deceased. Dave and Buster's is the closest thing the world has left.)
Tim hands the phone to me.
Me: Are you at Dave and Buster's?
Laurie: Yes! I am totally winning!
Me: That is awesome. Diana and I are really jealous.
Laurie: I got a pair of light-up maracas!
Me: Ugh, that is too cool. I'm going to give you back to your husband now.
I give the phone back to him.
Tim: Save me, Jesus.